You can not kick start a dead horse, you'll just crush yourself and walk away

So Lots has happened since I last update. Life has had its fair share of intersting twists and turns and has sent me through a ton of up and down days throughout this month. It'sactually kind of amazing.

I've got a lot to talk about at therapy this week. it's been a really hectic two weeks. my grandma being gone is a huge loss. i hate not having her around. i really miss my grandma. i kaugh it off and try to be funny, but it's really killing me that she's not here anymore. especially since i wasn't there for her the one time she needed me there. Even if it was only to say it would be ok and that everything was alright, i wasnt there and i feel like a huge disrespectful ungrateful asshole.